Covid. What a bastard. But, I was lucky. I get along with my family. We have a lovely garden. I’m pretty good on store cupboard cooking. No one got ill. But those long winter evenings were b…o…r…i…n…g!
I have had a long love affair with alcohol, but under lockdown I found I was drinking every night. This wasn’t good. It was a waste of money. I wasn’t particularly enjoying my drink(s). It was clear the sundown drink had become a habit, rather than a complement to a meal, a social emollient, or even an emotional lift.
I signed up to a free app, Try Dry, which helped support me through the abstinence bit. What I discovered about myself during these days was that Covid alcohol had become a way to pass the time and a balm for my frustration at feeling I couldn’t leave the house. I had been medicating feelings of boredom and frustration.
Once I figured that out, I could ask myself the right questions about what I wanted to do instead of drinking. While that’s fine and dandy, my substitute behaviour for drinking had morphed from nibbling a dainty plate of biscuits and cheese into dropping face first into a salad bowl of whatever salty snacks were in the cupboard. Grocery shopping had turned into an embarrassing experience of parading a cart of healthy fresh veg under a fluffy duvet of air-filled pillows protecting a wide range of savoury crunch.
I was gaining weight. I was still bored and frustrated. By week 3 of Dry Jan, I wasn’t even enjoying the bale of crisps I noshed through while watching old episodes of Midsomer Murders.
And so the Quit Snacking journey begins.